A Sharp Intake of Breath

The steeple of First Presbyterian, Houston

The steeple of First Presbyterian and a beautiful Houston sky

This happened yesterday:

An influential Houston church voted on Sunday not to defect from the nation’s largest Presbyterian body… The congregation of the First Presbyterian Church in Houston voted narrowly on Sunday to remain with the Presbyterian Church USA over a breakaway evangelical denomination. The alternative denomination — A Covenant Order of Evangelical Presbyterians, or ECO — advocates a stricter interpretation of the Bible and prohibits openly gay clergy.

A supermajority (67%) was required for the congregation to leave the PCUSA. They fell just 36 votes short, with about 64.5% voting to leave. What this means is that despite a comfortable majority wanting to leave, they’re staying put.

Close votes are painful in the church. I know many people, from all over the theological spectrum, who are praying for First Pres, regardless of whether we see eye to eye with them on biblical interpretation. I don’t agree with First Presbyterian Church’s leadership on many issues. I agree with them that the PCUSA has changed, but I don’t agree that they (we) have strayed from the fundamentals. We are body of Christians who are “reformed, and always being reformed.”

But the congregation does good ministry too. And I feel for them wholeheartedly.

64.5%. Man.

They will either find a way to move forward together, or they will split. And that hurts.

I’ll be returning to the PCUSA’s General Assembly this summer, this time as a commissioner (I’ve been an observer a few times). As I think about what we’ll be doing in Detroit, I think about the many church votes I’ve witnessed and taken part in. I remember a GA vote to overturn our denomination’s ordination standards prohibiting lesbian and gay clergy and officers. The vote was close. Very close. When the results flashed on the screen, there was a sharp intake of breath. There almost always is in close votes. (It’s right up there with the murmur that people make when someone shares a powerful story—not quite an Amen, I call it the Presbyterian Moo.)

Now, the gasp at a close vote can mean a lot of things—relief on the part the “winning side,” lament from those who lost so narrowly. But in the church, it’s also an expression of pain that we are not of one mind and heart on significant issues. The gasp is a realization that change, when it happens, is so hotly contested, yet so incremental. And yes, it’s a sympathetic cry of pain even from those whose point of view prevailed.

It’s hard for some people outside the church to understand that. The non-religious people I know, for whom the full humanity of LGBT persons is indisputable, sometimes find it puzzling that we’d be hurting for a congregation that wants to leave our denomination in part because of their apparent unwillingness to embrace that full humanity. “How are you not condoning bigotry?” they ask me.

First, I don’t find the label productive. It’s a non-starter.

Second, and more important: that sharp intake of breath is part of our witness. It’s not our only one: I expect that marriage equality will come to the PCUSA this summer, or perhaps two years from now, and rather than being a departure from our fundamentals, I personally see that as a faithful expression of them. And that action will be, I hope, a witness to the world.

But that sharp intake of breath matters too. In a world where we “like” Facebook statuses that we agree with, only ensuring that we see more of the same—in a world where cable news and blogs tell us exactly what we want to hear—in a world where narcissistic trolls have taken over internet comments such that meaningful back-and-forth debate is an endangered species—our unity in the Holy Spirit, in the bonds of peace, is a witness too.

6 thoughts on “A Sharp Intake of Breath

  1. Stephen

    Well said, MaryAnn. My thoughts exactly – except, of course, as always, what you wrote is much better written than anything I might have posted. 🙂

  2. Craig Barth, R.E.

    I was a commissioner to GA 220. I heard those gasps and moans from the Plenary floor. If not literally singing “The Church’s One Foundation.”, I was singing it to myself almost all the time.
    I place the LGBTQ matter on the same stage as the inclusion of non-Whites a century ago and this inclusion of women about half a century ago. The Church will be better once PCUSA takes a formal positive stand on inclusivity. However, I am almost equally as sad as to the emotional pain and loss that will be incurred to get us there.

  3. Cathy Steward

    I agree with Stephen…thanks for putting my thoughts into coherent words. I feel so sad for all involved. But, i think i feel the saddest for the 589 who voted to stay with the PCUSA…they are exhausted. And, now what happens? Can their be peaceful resolution when the staff and session were sooooo convinced they had to leave? A lot of the 589 were not going to stay and go to ECO…they are that loyal to “their church and the PCUSA”. So, this is a back-handed victory at best. And, now more time will be spent trying to come to a peaceful space instead of actually doing the work of the church. I do feel the Holy Spirit in all of this…maybe some of those in the “middle” will have the courage to speak up? Or, possibly another miracle will happen and some of the very conservative will think again about what they were trying to do as opposed to what God is calling them to do. I was riding my bike yesterday and just started singing the Hallelujah Chorus out loud one minute and then crying the next!

  4. Sarah Erickson

    Thanks, MaryAnn. Appreciate your reflections on this situation – that sharp intake of breath, sorrow and love mingled down…

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